Well here we are. Four days away from Christmas, and I've barely made a dent in my shopping list. Yes, procrastination is my middle name. But since you won't find me going anywhere near a mall (unless they're giving away free cars and bags of money) I'll likely be going the gift card route. Or if my family and friends are really lucky, they just might be scoring one of these stupendously awesome gifts I came across online:
1) Bacon wallet. Now you can really bring home the bacon--in a bacon wallet! To complete the ensemble, I highly suggest pairing it with the bacon tuxedo.
Hog couture
2) Inflatable fruitcake. Because no one wants to eat a real one. You probably don't want to eat this one either. Just sayin'.
3) Beer Beard. Secret beverage dispenser! Completely realistic looking!
4) Finger Sporks. Yeah, you laugh now. But guess who's going to be in demand at the next cocktail party?
5) Squirrel Underpants. Won't you think of the poor squirrels, people? Buy them some underpants for God's sake.
6) Inflatable Unicorn Horn for Cats. Because all cats secretly dream of being unicorns.
7) Yodeling Pickle. Say what to the what?!? This better end up in my stocking this year.
8) Macho tissues. For the dude who would never cry, but occasionally needs a tissue for some completely manly reason. I might have to buy a few packages of these for my heroes.
9) Zombie Foot Dog Toy. Dogs love dismembered zombie parts that squeak. It'll be a huge hit!
10) Baby Mustache Pacifier. Because every baby should be able to rock the Magnum P.I. look.
Okay, okay. I know what you're thinking. You're really hopeful that my giveaway this week will be one of the above awesomely spectacular gifts. Well, it's not. *waits for the boos to subside* Instead, I'm offering up a $15 Samhain giftcard AND an autographed copy of my newest print release, Getting Familiar With Your Demon to 2 lucky winners! You know the drill, comment on this post and the guest posts up through SATURDAY, December 29 and you'll earn one entry a day. Good luck!
16 comments:
I loved Angry Scotsman chewing gum...the display case alone was classic. Why don't they make it anymore?
vitajex(at)aol(Dot)com
Yoddling all the way till Christmas and I can't wait to see what you will offer us next lol Maybe a puffer fish mafia dvd movie, I hear they will go in sale soon at every local walmart :D
How can you go wrong gifting the Yodeling Pickle. I sure hope I get one of those.
Thanks for the fun post. All those gifts sound totally intriguing.
e.balinski(at)att(dot)net
I <3 this post. I want the unicorn cat now. Happy Holidays!
Lasha
mslasha at gmail dot com
OMGosh those are hilarious.Who comes up with these things.lol.I so want to give the Baby Mustache Pacifier as a baby gift for my niece.lol.
Thanks for the giveaway
elaing8(at)netscape(dot)net
Too funny! I went & ordered the finger sporks for my daughter (she had a thing for sporks when she was younger)!
Happy Holidays & thanks for the amazing giveaway!
elizabeth @ bookattict . com
My sister would love that zombie dog toy for her little furry monster. LOL! Thanks for the awesome giveaway!
JYL22075 at gmail dot com
There is a gift for just about anybody out there. LOL.
Thanks for the generous giveaway!
strive4bst(At) yahoo(Dot) com
Surely no one who owns a cat would actually be so brain-dead as to attempt put that horn on their cat. O_o
The Yodeling Pickle, now that's tempting. :D
beasbooknook@gmail.com
These are interesting gifts.
bn100candg(at)hotmail(dot)com
I laid claim to the yodeling pickle on Twitter a few days back. That, and asshole repellent. And "You might have touched your genitals hand sanitizer". It was a busy day for me.
You have GOT to be kidding, Jodi!!! What an incredible collection of possible gifts! *plotting recipient list* Wow!!
LOL some of these are absolutely crap-tastic! I'll have to share a few with friends see if they believe it. Hopefully I won't see any of these this year!
bas1chsemail at gmail dot com
OMGoodness, some of those, ummm ...
Thanks for sharing the list...
BeckeyWhiteATgmailDOTcom
where in the world did you find these?
carolyn
j-coverholser at sbcglobal dot net
LOL! Thats some crazy stuff!
lauratroxel@yahoo.com
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